Wednesday, June 06, 2007

My Mind Is Overwhelmed

About a week ago, I think, I goined a group of peopp;e on the internest, to talk with otheer normal mental people. I was never welcomed openly by the other dementia groups I joined and really got tired of their living ing the problem, of course we do not have much of a solution except meds and that crap for us. But I know each day I loose a very small slice of who and what I once was. I starrred out at things and donot even know where the hell I am or have been, until something or someone brings me back to this shitty reality I call life. But this group has welccomed me with such open arms and encouragement that my heart, soul and eyes remain filled with tears. I have even met people with the disease and have gotten comments from others who have had parents, friends and others with it, and they say my writting has given them a neweer understanding of our side and helped them to cope with the frustration and pain theyyy have unfortunately experienced. I been call courageous, good, outstanding and ben thanked. I am neither courag. or outstanding, good ?, I am just trying to let people know what this hell is really like f=rom the inside, watching yourself disappear. Yes I will die from this, complications they call it, mostly infections. I forget to eat take meds go to the restroom to the point that this screen inf front of me gets jaundice, then I know your in trouble. I have promised myself that before I have stepped over the edge into oblivion, unless it happens and I do not know it, but sense it at the tip of my toes, that my agony and that of my family further agony with me as a useless individual will cease. Do not get all bent out of shape, if you were here, I am sure you would feel the same, on the side of my blog listen to the Alzheimers Prayer, Parents Wish, you will need speakers and power point for( A Parents Wish) and you just may understand.

God Bless

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