Saturday, January 13, 2007

Ben Away For A Few Days

I know my last positing was rather harsh. But it is how I feel. I know others care and have a hard time with this damn Disease. But they need to know, how much hell it is for me inside. To look ant their faces and not know who they are and not know what I am doing. They need to know a word a smile from them means more to me then anything else in this world. Got somle new meds and they knocked me on my, well you get the picture and I had no idea where I was nothing new, little humor there. I have joined a number of advocay groups for those who suffer, but more importantly to help those who are to follow soon after me. Maybe they will not have to go through this, I thought living as an alcoholic 33½ years ago was bad, but this beats it hands down, because I have no defense or tools to use to fight it. Just the support of family friends and professionals, who really do not know what to do. I do feel sorry for them. But their words of encoouragement are needed. No spell check anymore the real me will be here from now on. Once a brillliannt person now being humbled.

God Bless You and This Great Countyr of Ours!

1 comment:

Dirty Butter said...

I'm glad to see you have "calmed down" a bit. Not that your anger and even rage aren't understandable, mind you. But at least this post shows that you know you have family that do care and love you.

It's odd to me in a way that you are so very aware of how much you are changing. My Mama and my hubby's Pop weren't at all aware of what was happening to them. Maybe the difference was their age, or maybe it's because the diagnosis is made sooner nowadays.

You're a brave soul to do without spellcheck. My typing has deteriorated so much in the last 3 or 4 months that it's pathetic. Sometime, when I get up the nerve, I'll have to leave you a comment without correcting anything LOL.

Do they still prescribe Aricept? That's what both of our parents were on.