Saturday, December 08, 2012

I find that it is easier to write here then to talk to others. I feel like things are becoming more confused and i am not sure wht the hell i am doing. I try to hide moset things and find it is getting harder. I try to remain happy on the outside, but inside is not so anymore. My days are just that days. they mean little, they hold no interest for me. I find being secluded much more frienndly. I feeel like everyone is watching me and not leaving me alone. The other day the shower door and I took a walk out of the shower. it is getting difficult to even take a shower. even worse harder to remember when and if i took one. this is the way life is for me now. I find it hard to enjoy my family and am beginning to drift from them, i wonder if this is the way it is for others, having some trouble finding the keys, fingers keep moombing around. Good thing for the drugs or I would looose it aroung everyone, the anger and distrust level in me is rising. i really am not in control too much anymore, i guess that is ok. the more i leave go of things the easier it seems to be, the less emotional i am and the less my head hurts.

take care until next time.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!
joe

2 comments:

JUST A MOM said...

Joe you amaze me,,,,,, I have said from the first time I came here to read that we NEED to put type writers or lap tops in the hands of people who have been diagnosed,,,,, I have hired a very new caregiver, a young man of only 23 years old. I handed him your book and he has NOT put it down!!!!!! you have helped him GET IT! thank you... ((HUGS)) my friend

Maggie Conner said...

Your blog is so inspirational to me. I work for a small senior living and rehab chain in Indiana, and while I interact with residents with Alzheimers all the time, being inside your thoughts and your head is truly informative, heartbreaking and inspiring. Thank you for writing this blog it is so helpful and I plan to pass it along to our entire staff. Thanks for all that you do - God bless and I'm so sorry for your pain. Just know that you are doing such a service for others. -Maggie