Thursday, August 05, 2010

I think that Anonymous has hit it right on the head. There are times that I want to wring the old guys neck. I love him and always will but he can be such a pill that it he is hard to take. But then he would dearly love for all of us to take a hike and not come back because we bug him. Two way street. I have not wanted to write on the blog because I am a private person and Joe has put us out here. So I guess that in the long run if it helps one of you out there, so be it. I understand the not happy caretaker thing. Joe and I have had a few problems lately and I have walked out of the house a few times and I probably will a few more before this is over. I have promised him that I will let him know when I am leaving now because the last time I left for 20 min. he left and we did not know where he was for an hour until the park rangers found him.
I was even on the phone with the police. Scary times. Our kids say things will get better but I feel that things will only get different. Better will be when we do not have any more worries or fights. I cry alot too. You really are not as alone as you think. I have not coped with this as well as it seems. I am learning though that there are others out here that feel as I do and I guess that is what this blog is all about. Please keep reading and posting when you can or care too. Our stories are so close, Joe hates to go out and I wait for him to decide what he wants to do, we tell each other that we love each other when we are awake to do so. Forget it at night. I do believe that he is grateful that I am around, but I do not expect him to say it. Just holding hands sometimes is enough.
Take care and enjoy those moments when he is truly with you.
Lynn

1 comment:

Mandy said...

I just want to say that I am finding all this talk back and forth very helpful. My spouse has ad and he can be a real pain at times. I feel like I am reading my life story between some of these posts. I find that sometimes I just need to leave him alone and walk away from the situation before one of us blows up and it is usually him. we both know it will not get better but just a glimpse of who he was before is a precious moment. Thanks for listening and being there.