Thursday, July 09, 2009
Who & What Am I Becoming?
There once was a tmie I could answer that but not anylonger. I have for the last several months porued myself into trying to start some things for the family to help make their financial future better. However, I remember the comment I made in the HBO thing, Once I was a genius, now I'm not. How true, it seems that once what I touched I mad work and well, now it goes to hell in a hand basket. My thoughts seem to be of the same charge and push each other out of the way, leaving avoid for confusion. That is the disease at work and having a good time of it. I find myself much more pissy and angry now, but I try to keeep the old trap shut and carry it alone. I am beginning to understand why we in this World of Ours, just sit alot and say nothing or just wander. We no longer have a grasp on things, what is real is it, I don't know any longer. I do not want to say things to family and friends because I don't want the constant hovering or them walikng on eggs. Frankly i do not know what I want, who I really am, where I have been or am going. Things from the past seem to be from yesterday and yesetrday seems to be the past. I feel truly helpless for the first time in my life. Where do we go from here? Down the tunnel.